So I had this dream last night. In it, we drove up to visit my great-grandma, who was “pleasantly confused,” as my mom would put it (early Alzheimer’s). She was living in this dingy apartment, and had half a dozen pet squirrels running around. Okay, we thought, it’s kind of weird that she put clothes on them, but she’s senile, so whatever. We visit, we talk, we take care of her for a while, and then we decide to go home, except the crap car that we drove up is broken down in the parking lot. Luckily, a good Samaritan stopped to give us a lift–on the U.S.S. Enterprise.

Well, there was a tag along–one of the squirrels. And wouldn’t you know it, it wasn’t a normal squirrel, but an alien! The squirrels took over the ship. They were everywhere. Hundreds of little fuzzy aliens running around in Star Fleet uniforms. And there was a Kirk squirrel. Don’t ask me why. He was hilarious, kept flirting with me and my mom. He was also kind enough to take us home before zipping off to Star Fleet headquarters to take it over. But hey, who am I to question squirrel logic?