Hee. You knew it was coming eventually. This is a pagan blog. I have to put in my Harry Potter jokes.

As a pagan, I do have a penchant for collecting witch-related items. One of my favorites is this enormous cauldron mug I found at Target earlier this fall. Okay, maybe it’s not HUGE, but it is certainly larger than your average tea cup.

Today it is cloudy and cold and definitely feeling like fall/winter here in Ohio, so I took my mug and filled it up with Swiss Miss Dark Chocolate Sensation. It was lovely after a trip to the library which left me shivering in my hoodie. It is especially good when paired with some pumpkin pudding (thanks, Mom!).

So….Anyone care to rob a bank with me? I need $1000 by tomorrow to pay for my flight to Florence. I really wish they would have given me more than five days before they started demanding money; It’s going to be December before my loan goes through, and in the mean time, I’ll have already had to give them $1700. A little warning next time might be nice.

I took a break from the Soul Sucking RedFlame scarf for the weekend. Even after blocking, it still curls badly, though it’s a bit smoother and more even, and maybe not quite as bad as before blocking. I’m at halfway, plus a foot or so. Why does Donny have to be so damn tall?

The Butterfly Hat has been frogged nearly to death at least five times, but at long last I am starting the decreases for what I hope is the last time. I actually finished it last night, but when I tried it on, it didn’t even go down to my ears, so I had to rip back basically to the butterflies and start again. We’ll see how it goes this time. *crosses fingers*

The Kimono Sweater has been placed on hold until after Christmas, or at least until after I finish the scarf. In the mean time, I’ve decided to make a hat for my dad, and a cowl. He doesn’t wear scarves, because the only time he wears anything like hats, gloves, etc, he’s usually working on the tractor, and dangly things are a hazard. Thus, a cowl. Which is fine by me because I can just knit something thick, chunky, and stockinette in the round while I’m sitting through lecture after lecture on Greenberg and Minimalists. I’m hopping that if I’m knitting with the yarn, I won’t be as tempted to strangle myself with it.

I’m glad Greenberg is dead. Thank Goddess for small miracles.

Speaking of deities, the God of Fashion and I really need to have another little chat.

I have an obsession with ballet slippers. I currently own at least four pairs, and I was wearing them TWO YEARS before Hollywood and everyone else got their grubby little mits on them, thankyouverymuch.

Sadly, last week I wore out my favorite pair of basic black ballet flat, the ones with the criss-cross elastic straps across the arch, my very first pair. I headed out to Walmart to get a replacement pair.

Of course, the exact style is no longer being made, but I found a really cute pair of simple black flats I’ve been eying forever that were only $7. I decided that it was time to spring for them.

There is a little issue here. These particular shoes came in denim, black, velvet, patent leather, red, and tan. I wanted black. Just black. Plain and simple.

I tried on the denim ones first though, because they were the first pair of size eights I found. Perfect. Grab a pair in black. Go to check out.

Return home to find that I can hardly squeeze my bare foot into flats, while I could easily wear the denim ones, even with my thick socks on.

Confused, I return the shoes to Walmart and try again. After 20 minutes in the shoe department, and two different stores, it dawns on me that the sizing is COMPLETELY MESSED UP. Size eight blacks are smaller than size eight blues. The 9’s were clown shoes on me, and a 7 1/2 wouldn’t go on my foot at all. Depending on the color, a size eight could be too big or too small. I even tried on some pairs where the left shoe was too big, but the right one was too small, even though they were labeled the same!

Okay, I know you fashionistas are going to laugh at my plight, but being broke and also cheap, Walmart is the only place I can afford to shoe shop. In fifteen years, I have never had so much trouble buying a pair of shoes before!

At last, I found one single, solitary pair of plain, black, 8 1/2 ballet flats. No other shoe style, even those made by the same company (No boundaries, which was my favorite brand until they fucked up their jean sizing–another very long story) had that issue.

Some of you knitters might have heard of “We’re knot going to take it,” in which the knitters of the world picked a single day to call all the yarn companies and tell them they were sick of knots in their yarn. Well, I propose a similar solution. Women’s clothing manufacturers need to get together and standardize all of their sizing, for shoes, blue jeans, etc. We have a universal standard for bras, why not jeans? Men have universal sizing, and they don’t even care how their clothes fit.

The logic is that if we have to spend more time in the stores, then we will buy more. I say, screw that. If I can’t find a pair of jeans in the first five I grab, I go to a different store. I’m not wasting my time. It’s ridiculous the way the fashion world works, and I am sick and tired of being jerked around by them. Why do you think I make my own clothes?

Okay. Enough ranting. But seriously, we need to do something. Fine, we can’t all be a size two, but is it really necessary to make us guess whether we’re a 6, 8, or even 12? Really now.